Father’s Day Isn’t Too Cool?
Father’s Day—it’s the holiday that never quite rivals Christmas or the Fourth of July. Maybe it’s because our feelings about dads are often a mixed bag. We know, we get it! Father’s Day never gets anyone too excited. That’s because there’s a lot of mixed emotions about fathers.
What’s a Father?
Kittens, gerbils, dogs, and stuffed animals excluded, let us keep the “What is a Father” definition to “human baby makers.” Fathers put babies inside of women and have the lightest load in the ordeal. Nevertheless, they’re important throughout the painstaking process that women must endure while carrying a fat, greedy, always hungry human being inside of her for nine months.
Not all seed producers become fathers, however, as some solely provide the magic goop as a donor which ends up in a test tube so not-Daddy can cover his car payment or buy some scratch lotto tickets at his local Citgo.
Wonder Woman’s Utopia!
But a father is more than just a seed producer. Not according to Wonder Woman, however, and the people who inhabit Paradise Island. Here, men are not welcome, as those found on Paradise Island are reincarnated souls of women who were killed by men. In reality though, a father is someone who educates, sets good examples, and protects their offspring.
Almost spit out your coffee laughing?
Ok, SOME fathers never reach the height of creating lasting memories in the heads of their offspring. SOME fathers are runaways, abusers, cheaters, and firm butt spankers. And it leaves a mark.
There are two sides to every coin, and for those who have had wonderful fathers, this is a holiday to celebrate with a funny card, Home Depot gift certificate, or a new 78-piece tool set to build things with. For those who’ve had a horrible experience with their fathers, now is the time to order a plate of pancakes with chunky strawberry syrup, ask for a steak knife, and play pretend.
On Average
I want to give Father’s the benefit of the doubt. There are some great ones out there that pass down family history, pay their child support, and help ensure their offspring don’t end up drug addicted feigns living in the gutter with hairy jungle apes for friends.
These are the fathers that we lift on this day and praise; because they fulfilled their primary biological purpose to procreate, guided their children with love, and supported them with buttloads of money throughout their awkward years of failure.
To those Dad’s, this Bud’s for you! ¡Feliz Día del Padre! (Happy Father’s Day)
As a Side Note…
To the women out there without a husband. Take a look at the stock around you. Anyone can be your Daddy! Maybe you need a lot of sugar, and I’m not judging — just be careful about those Dad’s that linger in the back alley, with an evil grin and. Their sugar has expired, turned rancid, and they will probably make you end up on Paradise Island with Wonder Woman.
And for those who had a horrible father. I am sorry. Most likely you will never find a new Daddy, but you can keep hope. You can also rebuild yourself internally by learning a martial art and being able to kill a man with your bare hands.
Bad Dad’s
For the bad Dad’s out there, it is still your day in the sun, but SHAME on YOU. Beware that on this holiday you may become the target at a shooting range, ax throw, or dart game. At least you’re being remembered while your image is being blown to bits and ill will is directed at you. Perhaps this Father’s Day will remind you that it’s not too late, how important Fathers can be, and how you can come and learn Spanish with Kasa De Franko if you want too. We accept Bad Dad’s too.
Gift Him Language
Father’s Day is the perfect day to tell your Dad I love him, and that he needs to consider how much fun he will have if he can say more than “mas sour cream” at his local favorite Mexican joint.
Imagine if Dad can tell the sexy waitress that “God must’ve taken the stars from the sky and put them in her eyes,” in Spanish.
Who knows? He may be called back into duty and maybe order more mayonnaise. If he goes back to duty, he may need to learn some sexy and romantic phrases in Spanish.
Spice Up Your Spanish
Forget the mayonnaise! If you want to add some romantic flair to your Spanish vocabulary, check out our blog, “Things Spanish People Say in Bed”, for a cheeky collection of phrases. For even more daring expressions and sexy vocab, explore “El Sexi Chupacabras”, where you’ll find sensual words and learn how to say ‘I love you’ in Spanish and more.
Legendary Tales & Folklore
Looking for some legendary tales and folklore? Visit our ‘Legends & Folktales’ section for stories featuring mythical beings like la Santa Muerte, la Llorona, la Ciguapa, El Sexi Chupacabras, and other figures from Hispanic traditions.
Learn & Laugh in Spanish
If you prefer laughs over love, we have you covered! Phrases like ‘¡Feliz Año Nuevo!’ or ‘¡Me Gusta la Chucha de tu Madre!’ can bring a chuckle, but we always recommend learning languages with respect. Check out our ‘About’ section to learn more about our passion for teaching, and don’t miss our free lessons at Kasa de Franko.
Discover Kasa De Franko
Curious about Kasa De Franko? At KDF, we offer flexible, enjoyable, and affordable Spanish lessons for kids, adults, and seniors alike. Our polyglot instructor and founder, Franko, is an expert in Spanish culture and accelerating language learning.
The Kasa De Franko team includes instructors, tutors, programmers, linguists, and polyglots who love to share their native language and culture with students. We’re here to support you on your journey to Spanish fluency.
Start Your Spanish Adventure Today
Ready to start your journey to Spanish fluency? Visit Kasa de Franko, your language oasis in the San Jose & San Francisco Bay Area! Whether you prefer one-on-one sessions or group classes, sign up for a free Spanish class today by clicking the red button to get started and always remember…..
